Is the jacuzzi not sacred?
Is there not a place where a man can go and flop around and pretend to be a seal without interruption? I don't care if you're bored or lonely or have Asperger's or whatever the fuck your reason is; if I'm wearing swimming trunks, I don't want to meet you and I especially don't want to engage in small talk with you.
I'd rather pretend to be a seal, thanks. Humans are dumb.